“No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.” Buddha
I think the journey to “finding oneself”, can be a long and difficult path for some. I know for myself, that I am continually growing, learning and discovering what makes me “Kimberly”. My journey to now has been filled with laughter, love, tears, dark nights, deep inquiry and silence. I have had temper tantrums, ran away, stayed tough and stood firm, and ultimately, surrendered.
It’s when we choose to live in the “victim mentality” that we fail ourselves. Many of us have had one of those days that we just had no more words, no more tears, and find ourselves fallen to the floor, in the fetal position, crying out to God to “save” us. We have all prayed for a miracle, right!?
For me, when the crying stopped, there was a relief. When I was exhausted and had nothing more to spill out. More than once, I felt a rush of peace take over my being, reassuring my soul, that all was going to work out just fine. And of course, it did.
When we fall, we have to get up! It doesn’t mean that we get up at that very moment. Sometimes it takes some time to surrender. Our ego is strong, our will is strong. Sometimes, we just need to take our time and stay on the floor until the answer comes. The answer does come, sometimes like the sound of a rocket coming through the room, other times, like that small still voice only your own soul can hear. But we have to be in the “right” mindset, or spirit mind, if you will, to hear the answers.
I have found that when I am going through a new challenge or a tough time, that I need to just stop, and surrender in all things, and in everything. I just stop. I surrender. And when I do surrender, I find out a little bit more about my soul’s desire. I find out a bit more about me, as I walk my path, one step at a time, one breathe at a time, one still small voice at a time and one prayer at a time. No one could walk my path for me, nor save me. I had to do it myself.
When I surrender, I hear God speak. Life is good for me now, and my life is full of blessings every day. No one could have made the steps for me, cried for me or laughed for me. I had to do it for myself. I am glad I did. I am now whole!
Here are a few poems that I have written while on my path to finding myself and saving myself. I hope you enjoy reading them. Thank you for stopping by. Namaste, Kimberly
Remembering Self
I feel good at last.
I remember who I am.
Up from my tear-filled drenched soul
I craved to see the rays from the sun.
Oh, I how I prayed to feel my skin dry again.
I thought my Self had withered a will to die
but up sprung a small stream of hope,
which then grew to engulf my being
reminding that I was worth saving,
that I was a Child of The Most High God
and that no matter what was done to me
or what I did to sabotage my Self
was the past,
and today is a new day
a gift to live in the moment
by breathing one breath at a time,
walking my path one step at a time.
(For Reverend Farolyn Mann)
Goodbye, Hello
Goodbye to the sad stories
of dark painted backdrops
in swirling colors of black , blue and red
drenched in tears of blank uncertainty
draping darkness throughout the canvas of my soul
framing a cold view of the world,
of an angry unloving God.
Hello to the countless unlived happy stories
waiting to unfold
in swirling bright colors of yellow, pink and white
multi-hued in smiles of abundance
painting joy throughout the canvas of my soul
creating a world view of unity
and a rebirth of a kind loving God.
Truth
All along the twists and turns
to find me,
to find my God,
to find the one I had lost,
I found You.
I found Me.
I believed the thought
that I was lost
that You were gone.
My path led me to reawaken
realizing truth.
Truth, that I always knew.
The God I always knew.
Truth that You and I are one.
Truth that we have always been.
In my silence, in my search,
I found the answers.
I was not lost.
I found You.
I found Me.
We are One.
Truth.
(For Reverend Farolyn Mann)
Kimberly Molyneaux 